This is not a true story.

It's over!

Thu, 23 Mar 2006 00:12:15 GMT

Okay guys, my run with this journal is through.

errortastic

ADD IT!

If you want to stick with me, add the new journal, errortastic.

Good times ahead, I promise!

<3 meg.

A surprise nosebleed during sex got blood everywhere. But we didn't stop.

Wed, 22 Mar 2006 22:03:34 GMT

1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open it to page 161.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the sentence in your journal along with these instructions.
5. Don't search around and look for the coolest book you can find. Do what's actually next to you.

Confucian scholars and others believe that cultivation of the self, of character and integrity, are necessary elements for those who are involved in public life.
- Philosophy in Action by Wayne Sproule

Last night was the Prodigy concert. It definitely kicked ass; in fact, the whole day kicked ass except for having to wake up early and Jocelyn's hair catching on fire (yes, it was hilarious, and yes, I feel bad for laughing).

That's my toe. And ow, does it ever hurt. I got a little excited coming in from outside in my bare feet (yeah, I know it's cold).

Are you grossed out yet?

Is it possible to fall in love with words?

<3 meg.

I like to climb trees, that's normal right? Everyone gets so hung up on me dating a zombie.

Sun, 19 Mar 2006 22:45:20 GMT

I'm back from Montréal and still alive!

Provisions for the journey. Alcohol, and lots of it.

This was hilarious. Which is why Karen is laughing. We ordered a large pizza and two pieces of cheesecake. We got two large pizzas and one piece of cheesecake (which we split, sadly). It was hilarious.

In Montréal, the delivery places are so superior to anywhere else. They deliver until 5am, and the food ranges from sushi to Thai to poutine (of various styles including smoked meat and Italian).

This is the view of the Montréal Olympic Stadium that has caused all sorts of problems for the city, including huge debts and the collapse of the ceiling. It's cool looking but quite outdated now. We visited the Biodome, which is attached.

I'm so French. SO FRENCH. I dare you to say otherwise.

So I brought a huge bottle of wine (1.5 litres actually) to Montréal but totally forgot that wine has corks. But I mean, what would a French hotel be if they didn't have a corkscrew? So, successful, I opened the bottle and drank it in the first night.

The view from our hotel room. Sexy, right? Actually, we were two minutes from St. Laurent station and five minutes from the Latin Quarter. But there was a huge hill you had to walk up at the hotel. Sucks.

This is the random vacuum cleaner. Yeah, I don't get it either.

I'm so mature. Every hour was 420, seeing as Karen and I made a pact to turn off our cellphones and not wear watches. We had no sense of time.

Most amazing sushi ever. Along Mont-Royal near the Plateau. God, it was good. It tasted as good as it looks.

My lovely Karen and the view of a bus. We bought three day transportation passes and jetted around the city with them. We rode this bus from end to end, ending up at Pie IX (PIE NINE!) station.

I took this picture at the Biodome. It's a huge greenhouse thing that has various climates and PENGUINS!

So that was my trip. It was lovely. I'm so relaxed. I got home at 7am this morning and slept until 3pm. I had an absolutely fantastic time.

Tuesday March 21 Prodigy at Kool Haus

Saturday March 25 The Postage Stamps, Now Yr Taken, Dance Electric, Andre Theriault at The Cat's Eye

Wednesday March 29 The Gossip, No Dynamics, Fox the Boombox at Xpace

Friday April 7 Laura Barrett, DD/MM/YY, Boymagic at The Boat

Monday April 10 The Yeah Yeah Yeahs at Kool Haus

<3 meg.

She wanted her ashes scattered at sea, but it's like she always said, "no".

Wed, 15 Mar 2006 15:47:47 GMT

Karen and I are going to Montréal today, leaving on a bus, and will be back Sunday morning.

We have a sweet room downtown, two seconds from the bus station. If you would like to come stay for a while, give either me, or Karen a call on our cellphones. We have a lot of booze.

I'm dead serious!

Let's do it!

<3 meg.

I have super powers and a costume. Every night I panic just outside my door.

Thu, 09 Mar 2006 03:47:03 GMT

I swear I'm going start updating this thing again.

My mind's been elsewhere. But here are some pictures.

That will do for now.

<3 meg.

Pump up the jam!!!11

Sun, 29 Jan 2006 06:58:46 GMT

This has been a long weekend! And it was good.

I saw:

- Grant
- Karen
- Ana
- Uxia
- Ian
- Volvie
- Kevin
- Mike

Think back to English class and reading hamlet and feeling like shit. There were these things in the plays called asides where characters essentially step out of reality to have a thought.

Well holy shit, they fucking exist. Stepping out of reality and talking about stepping out o reality is ten pounds of intense in a five pound sack. Frathouse. Basement. Asides. Mental note.

Signing out,
Greghan. Greghan?

wtf?!

FINALLY!

Sat, 14 Jan 2006 20:44:54 GMT

IT'S MY BIRTHDAY, BITCHES!

Rad. I'll be downtown this evening. Call 416 829 9270 if you want to hang or something!

<3 meg.

If you lose one of the only constant things in your life, of course you'll get upset.

Wed, 11 Jan 2006 00:28:36 GMT

Is it bad when you have to force yourself to feel emotion?

Yes, I think it is.

<3 meg.

My head is so messed, but I'm in love with that.

Sun, 01 Jan 2006 18:09:30 GMT

Oh... wow.

Happy 2006.

<3 meg.

Well that was a stocking stuffer.

Mon, 26 Dec 2005 19:47:53 GMT

I have no voice, none at all. And it's frustrating to the max. I mean, it gives me a chance to observe and sit back, but that was novel for oh... about 10 minutes.

This Christmas definitely ranks up there. I got to spend it with an amazing family, and my Christmas eve was occupied by a certain boy. So overall, beautiful.

Taj keeps bothering me to update. So here's your update, sucker!

<3 meg.

P.S. so what's the word for the next few days? Tuesday is Markhamania, Wednesday is a show, Thursday is Karen (omgz I miss you too), Friday and Saturday... I don't know. I'm free those days, Saturday night obviously I'm busy.

CHARLOTTE I NEED TO SEE YOU. YOUR GIFT IS TEH AMAZING.

I think everyone died while we were inside (eachother, lulz).

Sat, 24 Dec 2005 12:18:09 GMT

Yeah it's been a while, and I'm wired.

1. What did you do in 2005 that you'd never done before?
a) Went to Korea.
b) Drove myself to school.
c) Wore contacts.
d) Drank until I was actually ill.

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I don't make resolutions, well I do... but I always forget them. So I won't make any this year. That's my resolution.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Hmm I hope not. Well apparently Micaela did. Hah.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Not really.

5. What countries did you visit?
South Korea, England, France, Cuba, United States.

6. What would you like to have in 2006 that you lacked in 2005?
A job would be nice.

7. What date from 2005 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Well I might be cheating, so I'll say two. September 12, which was the day of the Bloc Party concert and September 19, the day of Sigur Ros. As well, I think November 24, the day I got my license. And Sufjan. Oh my god.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
I got my license! That was a pretty big one. And I passed biology. w00t.

9. What was your biggest failure?
I've failed/disappointed a lot of friends, and family... don't even get me started.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Well I had to get a root canal. But other than that, not really.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
This is tough. I don't really know! Probably my cellphone.

12. Whose behaviour merited celebration?
Hmmm... my dad's probably.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Haha my mother's.

14. Where did most of your money go?
a) alcohol and/or pot
b) shoes
c) travel

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Kid Koala!

16. What song will always remind you of 2005?
Oh there's several. "Banquet" by Bloc Party, "Do Somethin'" by Britney Spears, the whole Chemical Brothers CD.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder? Oh god, happier.
ii. thinner or fatter? I think maybe thinner.
iii. richer or poorer? Uhh. Much poorer.

18. What do you wish you'd done more?
Listen.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Talk.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
Well Christmas Eve (today!) I'm going to Ashleigh's to sleep over. It's going to be a blast. Then perhaps on Christmas day I'm going to my dad's parent's house.

21. Did you fall in love in 2005?
Oh man. Yup.

22. How many one-night stands?
Uhhhh...

23. What was your favorite TV program?
I don't really watch TV, but 24 hours of Desperate Housewives in Nova Scotia pretty much got me hooked.

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
I have no idea.

25. What was the best book you read?
Hah... probably Diary by Chuck Palahniuk.

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Sufjan Stevens, hands down.

27. What did you want and got?
An easy grade 12 schedule, some rad new friends.

28. What was your favorite film of this year?
Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, I mean, it has gay Val Kilmer!

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I had a little party with Harleen when we turned 16. And I had my water salted!

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Less problems with my mom.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2004?
Cheap. Very cheap. And layered.

32. What kept you sane?
Music, weekends.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Oh Brad Pitt KTHX.

34. What political issue stirred you the most?
Not sure on this one. Maybe just Stephen Harper.

35. Who did you miss?
Adam while he's away in South America.

36. Who was the best new person you met?
Oh man, I couldn't really choose, probably a tie between Karen and Grant!

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2004:
As much as we convinced ourselves that image matters, it's so much more important your image of yourself is strong rather than how others perceive you.

Merry Christmas/holidays/whatever! I'm still alive and still well, just not updating as much because I R TEH LAZY.

<3 meg.

All I want for Christmas is social calm, really.

Sat, 10 Dec 2005 16:33:37 GMT

I don't know, man.

Life is messed.

Despite all that, there have been some highlights in the past week that I have enjoyed.

I can't really put them into words, because there's some shitty highlights too. My faith in humanity has been reaffirmed, however, by the fact that I lost my purse at Union Station in a bout of stupidity on Tuesday night. Peter picked me up and drove me around and bought me Taco Bell because he is amazing and can't really drive stick-shift all that well, and then the next day Union Station called. Someone turned in my purse. With money, ID, iPod, everything.

So great people do still exist in this world. And we take them for granted. That's really my point to this story.

It's been a twisted week.

<3 meg.

P.S. don't get me wrong, "riding the elephant" and seeing Aeon Flux with Ana was killer, Korean food and hanging out with Charlotte and Becky was great, the parking structure adventures with Ian and Jocelyn, saving Grant from imminent danger (well, missing a ferry), Thai Satay with Cass-ass and Harleen, and getting Stars tickets and seeing Adrienne were all great.

Sleep is for the weak, Meghan!

Mon, 05 Dec 2005 16:58:46 GMT

So I don't really know what happened this weekend. Just vaguely. But it was fucking fun, and fucking retarded. So let's post pictures and leave it at that.

You have to capture the panic in his eyes!

Need a light?

The disgusting remains of cinnamon hearts and ice left in my car overnight. We thought it would make my car smell nice. Nope.

That's not really what Jocelyn looks like.

I slept twelve hours last night and it was glorious. Last night I also saw Grant, as a fluke, and made some money.

It has been a great weekend! How were yours?

His wicked sense of humour
Suggests exciting sex
His fingers focus on her
Touches, he's Venus as a boy

He's exploring
The taste of her
Arousal
So accurate
He sets off the beauty in her
He's Venus as a boy

<3 meg.

You must be sick of me now. Try harder.

Mon, 28 Nov 2005 17:28:24 GMT

This weekend was full of:

- sex
- drugs
- electronica

And right now, my mind is on:

- you

I mean, really. It was that great.

Just wait until it hits me.

<3 meg.

"Okay sorry, want to make out? Sure. makes out Now back to your story?"

Sun, 27 Nov 2005 15:23:11 GMT

Whoa.

Last night was something extraordinary. I didn't sleep even a bit.

I'm actually still trying to sort out what happened, and how it happened.

No, you don't get more details than that.

<3 meg.

How long ago that all seems.

Sat, 26 Nov 2005 19:00:01 GMT

i can't get out of my mind the amount of pure fucking fun and care and enjoyment and comfort that we've got going in our troupe. it's not just about getting fucking wasted all the time. it's about wandering in the cold and talking about whatever the fuck you want to talk about, and being able to completely let go of whatever you thought you were and turn into whatever you are at any given moment.

Fuck remembrance.

I want my youth to be a blur of fishsticks and bright lights.

Who's with me?

<3 meg.

P.S. I was reading our old e-mails. We've both changed, and I think you used to like me. I used to deny it fiercely, but after all we've been through and lost, how could I?

There's only so much I can do for you.

Fri, 25 Nov 2005 12:33:35 GMT

I never post these things.

Your Birthdate: January 14

You work well with others. That is, you're good at getting them to do work for you.
It's true that you get by on your charm. But so what? You make people happy!
You're dynamic, clever, and funny. And people like to have you around.
But you're so restless, they better not expect you to stay around for long.

Your strength: Your superstar charisma

Your weakness: Commitment means nothing to you

Your power color: Fuchsia

Your power symbol: Diamond

Your power month: May

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Iiiiiinteresting.

In other news,

I GOT MY FUCKING LICENSE.

<3 meg.

You know you're cool when you drink with your hairdresser on a Wednesday night.

Wed, 23 Nov 2005 23:55:56 GMT

Well a real update is pretty overdue now for Saturday and so on. I got into Toronto at 310 on Saturday and took the subway to Karen's. We got sexified, since Sean Ward's party said "dress sharp"! So we did it. Karen tore up a skirt and I gave her some pearls, we did makeup, and drank some cheap rum. It was pretty fun. I wore my hat of course.

After that, we went to the dollar store and bought advil, and grabbed a coffee from Coffee Time (oh, *sigh*). Then we met Adam on the platform and it all becomes a blur from here. We jetsetted down to Queen and took the streetcar all the way East to the Gladstone. what a cool fucking place. I haven't really been West of Bathurst before, but it's nice... especially Trinity-Bellwoods area.

So we got there around 530 on the dot, and the setup was mad. MC Sean Ward came on with some mad beats, and there was an accompanying video. Also on the bill was WordBurglar who made some nice rhymes. I got the sixth comic from Sean Ward and the last band came on, Eden Ants. They were alright, pretty solid. Great cover of "Girls & Boys" by Blur, everyone was singing along and dancing.

Karen and I were dying of hunger so we had to leave before the great finale, which was a cover of the The Cars' "You Might Think". Adam psychically filmed it, so it was okay. We took the streetcar to Spadina in hope of finding banh mi, Vietnamese subs. We ended up at Pho 88 and had pho. Adam and Ian joined us shortly after and we ate and took retarded pictures. We had planned on going to the Homo Hop in the gay ghetto that night to meet Karen's friends, but we decided not to.

Karen and I had some illegal activities in the washroom, and then we all decided to walk to a park in Kensington. There were also some more illegal activities there, and we hung around on the swings and time passed. I don't know how long we were there. The whole night seems like two days. After that we got dead lazy and took the craziest route to try and get to Burrito Boyz. I'm making a map. We had a TTC day pass, which is amazing because it's $8 for unlimited travel for up to 6 people.

I tried making a map but it was too hard. Basically it was up Spadina, down Spadina to Richmond, along Richmond to University, back along Queen St. and down Peter St. A big circle to get a burrito.

Eventually we got there, but not after riding the glass elevators at the Hilton. Mindblowing. We got subs, and hung out, and then Ian left to go to some party or another. We were all pretty sick of the club scene, since most of the people are disgusting, and decided to take the subway up to Karen's since it was bordering on 1230 and trains stop at 130. We got there, and Karen and Adam went into the other room while I dicked around, singing badly, and spinning in circles on the chair.

All in all, Karen and I stayed up until 6am playing cards and discussing our lives. It was really great. The next morning I woke to Grant calling me and asking to meet up. I was feeling pretty gross since I didn't shower or anything, so I told him we'd do it next weekend. Karen and I went to the dollar store again, then to Second Cup where we got breakfast and coffee. More talking ensued, and Peter picked me up. I really had meant to go to Mike's farmhouse Saturday night but I totally forgot. I got home around 3pm and proceeded to write my law ISU.

On Monday I didn't do a whole lot, Tuesday, Peter and I had a "date"... that is, coffee and parallel parking in a blizzard. Today I got my hair done and it was a fieldtrip to the Toronto Star that was pretty lame. Who told them I wanted to be a journalist? I DON'T!

Tomorrow I'm retaking my G2 test. Wish me luck. And then going downtown to get tickets for Saturday and such. This weekend is looking good. Friday shall be hanging out at Xspace with the coolest group of people this side of the planet, then Twist of Fate is Saturday and Mike better fucking come because it's going to be super rad.

PETER YOU TARD. YOU LOCKED MY KEYS INSIDE MY CAR. HOW CAN I TAKE MY TEST?!

<3 meg.

P.S. Karen, or anyone who wants to know about some cheap excellent food in Toronto, look HERE!

If you think this could be about you, it probably isn't.

Wed, 23 Nov 2005 04:00:54 GMT

It's times like these I realize...

you have a very sexy last name.

And I ~~kinda~~ ~~sorta~~ really miss fantasizing about it.

Let's get drunk on Saturday,
walk up Primrose Hill until we lose our way.

I'll just stay awake 'til the morning,
with make up all over my face.

<3 meg.

I wish I could take back every second I wasted with you, every word I should have said.

Mon, 21 Nov 2005 23:04:18 GMT

It doesn't matter what people think. Social acceptance is a different concept than social appearance. i think that as long as you're with people that make you happy, it doesn't matter what other people say about you

I wish so badly i had a car. Because you know what i would do? i would dress up in the most awkward thing i own, walk into your school, and take you out of class. and i would wave to your friends, and wink at your teachers.

and we would just do something stupid.

Thank you. I'm not alright, but thank you.

This weekend was a good one. A great one. I have very few words that could describe this weekend. But I will write a whole entry describing it for you, WITH PICTURES!

Let's do Wednesday-Thursday-Friday. On Wednesday, I had a half day and then went to downtown Oakville and rescued Mike's hat from a café. Yes, I am awesome. After that, I went downtown downtown and bought my tickets to Final Fantasy on January 12 (who's coming?!) at Rotate This. Then I jetsetted all the way up to Yonge and Eglinton and met Tyler at the Silver City there. He had super awesome free tickets to the new Ryan Reynolds movie. God, the man is hot (Ryan, but Tyler's not bad either, haha).

We got there and security was all tight. It was really busy. And the movie kicked way too much ass. It was hilarious and I recommend it 140%. After that, we headed to Pizza Pizza for free pizza (courtesy of my coupons) and Karen met us up at the top. It was great to see her, and I think she liked Tyler. We ate and talked, and then Karen grabbed a $2 sub and Tyler and I headed to Union. We ran to catch the 743 and made it. We got home safely. It was a really nice night.

On Thursday, it was a full day, then I came home after hanging out with Matt after school before pretty much turning around and going back to school for post-secondary information night. I went mostly to get my OUAC number since I'm going to apply soon. After that, I hung out with Matt (still at school at 8!) and Rebecca. Rebecca's dad gave me a ride up to Upper Middle and I bought Sam a huge jawbreaker. Then I went to her house and we watched the hockey game and CSI before I took a taxi home. It was really nice to see her since it had been a month and she was going through some rough time.

On Friday I also had a halfday, and had planned to take the bus to Jocelyn's with Rebecca but that fell through. So I hitched a ride home with Dax and chilled out for a bit. Then I got a lift to Asian Plaza and met Jon at Pho after getting Akko. We had big bowls of pho and talked. Then we went to Bubble Republic and Jocelyn showed up! We grabbed our teas, and headed to the bus stop. Now here's where it gets complicated. We took the 38 down to Dundas, then the 1C along Dundas, then the 31 down Glen Erin. This is all to get the to stupid LCBO. But it was worth it, Jon bought us the goods, and we proceeded to drink at the bus stop like the classy broads (and uh... man) we are.

Then we bummed a ride down the street to Rogers, where we rented House of Wax. After some milling around and meeting a guy we met on the bus earlier, we decided to walk back to my house. This was too much fun. I think it's best described in pictures.

It involved churches, police, fags, gas stations, lights, cameras, some guy named Elvin, holes in fences, sketchy Mississauga folks, long stoplights, kids with bongs, guys who take the bus and other fun things. Ya know. Oh and we were honked at. Because Jon is so hot.

We were honked at by a police car going into the park. We got home, and played Katamari. The night is pretty much a blur, but it was great. Everyone was gone by 12 and I went to bed at 130. By bed, I mean passed out. I was woken up the next morning at 10 by my cellphone, but then went back to bed until about 1130. I talked to Mike for a bit, then took the 238 train into Toronto. I missed Ian by about a minute (bleh, lame) and got downtown at 3.

HAHA now I'm getting into Saturday. I'll update about that later. I'm going parallel parking practicing-toiletry shopping-Best Buying tonight with Peter the Pagan Vegan. Should be interesting. I bet. Now I have kimchi ramyun to enjoy.

<3 meg.

P.S. SEAN WARD IS RAD!

[EDIT] I think this weekend is best summed up by an awesome comment I left in Adam's journal on Saturday night:

It's only after you've lost everything that you can do anything.

Fri, 18 Nov 2005 20:17:51 GMT

Montréal.

Tour of McGill including very talkative, enthusiastic student. Beautiful campus, great location. This is where I want to go to school. My mom actually said she would help me rent a loft here. Who's in?

Then we met Bobby, who knows me somehow. He was with his girlfriend, she was cute and young. He brought us t-shirts for SplashBash. We were invited to a frat party, basically. Somewhere way on the East side of Montréal. We met my mother for smoked meat and cheesecake at Ben's. Ben's is the campiest, sexiest place ever.

The waiters have been there since my mom was in university. She failed her first year, which makes me laugh hysterically, because she always claims that the gene for intelligence comes from the mother. Obviously, that's not so, as anyone who's spoken to my dad would know.

Random students and my cleaning lady showed up at Ben's and we chatted, and my mother got promptly owned by one of the foreign students. Afterward, we walked back to the hotel after shopping briefly. I invested in the sexiest hat you have ever seen.

I was also accosted by Ellen and Charlotte. I had known they were going to be in the city, but Ellen came up to me and said "nice hat". It took me a second, but there they were, along with Polly. It was delightful. Back at the hotel, we took time to skankify our t-shirts for SplashBash since Bobby got us Ls and they were gigantic (especially on Clara).

We left and walked on the RÉS (Montréal's version of the PATH) and bought some beer from the convenience store. We grabbed a poutine at McDonald's, and then went on a cold, long trek to find a Tim Horton's. We got there, and I drank beer and ate Timbit's like the classy lady I am. Then we took a taxi out to the SplashBash.

Let me say, this was the coolest fucking party I've ever been to. There were 1100 people there. It was inside an old indoor pool that had been emptied out. The dancefloor was the pool. It was retardedly cool; the DJ was great, and it was dark except for giant globes floating. Worst coatcheck ever, but it was awesome. We were hit on and then I had paint dumped on me. The party was basically a drunken paint/dance festival. It was cool.

I shotgunned 4 beers across the street before going in. Mistake. That's what resulted in that gigantic bruise. I fell on a beer bottle on the stairs into the pool. We got home at 2 or so and fell asleep pretty quickly. The next morning we took the subway out to Verdun, and shopped a bit at vintage stores. The whole day was mostly shopping, and we grabbed lunch at the best Vietnamese place ever.

This is my new investment (see above). Love it or hate it, it's amazing.

That night we split and Clara and her mom's friend went for sushi, while my mother and I split a bottle of wine and ate marginal Lebanese food. It was pretty nice. Hence the alcoholic comment; my mom becomes a world nicer when she's had even one glass of wine. We were too tired to do anything of importance, and no movies were playing, so I forget what we did instead.

We left at 10am the next morning and were back in Toronto at 4pm. It was a fantastic, short weekend. Sunday night I spent watching Desperate Housewives and Born into Brothels and Grey's Anatomy with the love of my life (*cough ASHLEIGH cough*) and then I went home the next morning. I didn't do anything else Monday, just recuperated mostly.

Métro tickets in Montréal cost $1.83 1/3!

I'll update about Wednesday and Thursday (because they were eventful, I swear) after this weekend is over. Tonight I'm going out to hang with some old friends (you guys, I KNOW YOU READ THIS). And I'm getting pho. Hells yeah.

In other unrelated news, I want to say thank you, and no, I'm not alright.

But I'm getting there. I need help.

<3 meg.

P.S. I am really not in a good mood. At all.

P.P.S. who's coming to a massive next weekend, hmm? 25th, $15. Twist of Fate, downtown. And then there's Controller.Controller on Friday night. Some great artists playing, good music, heavy bass, lots of people. It's awesome. SRSLY.

I am a parody of who I used to be.

Thu, 17 Nov 2005 04:16:31 GMT

How fucking vulnerable can I be?

Way to go.

<3 meg.

I know you love me, you don't know what you like; you're watching TV, I stay up all night.

Tue, 15 Nov 2005 01:27:23 GMT

Let me begin by saying that Sebastien Grainger is welcome to my pants any time.

YES I am bored, so I'm going to make a massive update. And maybe explain why I have that gigantic bruise on my lower back/ass. But wait! Rewind to Thursday. I had a half day, and headed downtown on the 1230 train. I caught up with Clara who magically appeared behind me on the walk to the GO station. We took the train together and went to H&M. And found the remnants of the new Stella McCartney collection:

a scarf and a t-shirt.

That was all that was left. Seriously. This was a one-time-only thing, and apparently the H&M hipsters tore the place apart. Oh well. I went to meet Alok and Jocelyn around 2. We decided to walk over to Edge and hope that Alok's cousin would show up with the Edge van and take me to get my coat at Lawrence and Yonge. The cousin never showed up, but I saw penser_a_rien waiting in line for Queens of the Stone Age at Edge. It was nice to catch up with her, even though she was really sick. I had met her (hi, Rebecca!) at the Go! Team show a while ago.

We decided to take the subway, and got to Lawrence waaaay too late. Karen had headed off to wherever she went, and we turned back around after barely getting reception hanging out over the exit stalls. I'm so so so sorry Karen! Hopefully I'll be downtown sometime this weekend or something and I can get that stupid coat from you! Anyway we went to Alok's house at Bloor and Bathurst (ironically, this is where I left my coat a week ago Friday). We got the tickets, and I borrowed a sweater from Alok, and then we headed down to Union. We met up with Volvie and some random St. Mike's guy, Ian headed home, and we hung out for about 5 minutes.

Jocelyn and I then walked up to St. Mike's and picked up some alcohol from Ian's locker (thank you so much!). The look of the kids' faces when we knocked on the door was priceless. It was pretty weird to have two girls knocking to get into a boys' choir school after hours. Then we walked up to Salad King and had delicious, spicy Thai food. After that we walked down to Union, sold my Nine Inch Nails ticket for like... nothing, then went to Harbourfront for a little pre-show celebration.

It was lame because the tickets said 7pm, which we assumed were doors; but DFA came on at 7. Our seats were kick-ass, but Jocelyn was sitting pretty far from me. I loved DFA. They are amazing live, and the fact that the drummer can drum and sing at the same time is insane. Very good show. Then Joss and I walked around a bit, and ran into Tamsyn and Alok. They got floor seats somehow. We were jealous. Queens of the Stone Age came on and they were pretty good. I'm not overly familiar with their music, but "Little Sister" was very solid.

Then Nine Inch Nails came on. Mmm. They played a long, good set. I mean, nothing compares to when I saw them at Kool Haus a couple months ago, but it was good. Hearing "Right Where It Belongs" with that huge screen and projector was beautiful. I think, however, I'm the only person who has EVER fallen asleep during a Nine Inch Nails show. A combination of exhaustion and too many intoxicants. It was great though. Very solid show on all accounts.

I met with Joss after and ran away with Alok's sweater on accident. The show ended relatively early and I got home at 1230. I talked to people for a bit, then went to sleep around 2. Here's where it gets retarded: I set my alarm for 4am, but it didn't go off. So I woke up to my dad banging on my door at 520 telling me that I have to get packed and ready in 5 minutes or I have to drive myself to Montreal. Needless to say, it sucked, but I got out the door.

I'm tired of this update, and I will update more about Montréal next update, I PROMISE. I'm also horny as all fucking hell.

I could write a thousand things I miss about you;
I miss sushi, and video games, and innocent fumbling in the dark.
I can never tell if you miss it too.
I wish I knew, because I am sorry, and I do want it back.

I want you.

Here's a preview of what's to come:

<3 meg.

P.S. what's going on this weekend? Jon and Jocelyn (Mike?) are we doing something? And Karen! We are so on for the 26th, eh, bebe? Gotta get the $15 tickets in advance... mmmm. All-night parties!

P.P.S. YOU ARE ALL BUYING TICKETS TO THIS AND COMING WITH ME AND THOSE BOWMANVILLE PEOPLE!

What are you looking for? You can't ask a drunk girl that question, silly!

Sun, 13 Nov 2005 21:42:06 GMT

Oh, Montréal.

<3 meg.

P.S. maybe you should become an alcoholic. You're much nicer when drunk. Just a hint, from your, you know, daughter.

Everything perfect, post-ecstasy, comes tumbling down. I'm sorry; I wish I could change, too.

Thu, 10 Nov 2005 01:50:48 GMT

Idiot, idiot, idiot.

Are you trying to sabotage what little relationship you maintain with me by preaching at me?

Angling for sympathy regarding your difficult life as a "single" mother will get you absolutely fucking nowhere, dear.

Calling me beautiful while lying through your teeth will get you even less.

<3 meg.